I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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