Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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