I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
