ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
