YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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