Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
whose parrot is this?
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
