It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Randomize
