she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
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Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
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Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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