i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
