Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
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