I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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