Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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