I heard we made out
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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