Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
