You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
