the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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