Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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