I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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