Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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