What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I checked into jail on foursquare
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
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