That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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