You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
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