I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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