Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
