There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
