She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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