He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize