i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
