): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Randomize
