what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
