erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
