Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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