dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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