Texts From Last Night

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  (352): View more from Florida

  Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish

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  (352): Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish http://tfl.nu/gqzy
  Replies (26) Good night (2969) Bad night (1213)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.

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  (585): I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me. http://tfl.nu/00st
  Replies (28) Good night (4871) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.

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  (404): Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm. http://tfl.nu/cydy
  Replies (12) Good night (6321) Bad night (1196)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store

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  (616): bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store http://tfl.nu/dcxn
  Replies (7) Good night (3488) Bad night (1403)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.

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  (919): Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though. http://tfl.nu/v85r
  Replies (7) Good night (1264) Bad night (2601)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.

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  (913): Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun. http://tfl.nu/h48x
  Replies (21) Good night (3993) Bad night (1254)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.

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  (443): she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates. http://tfl.nu/n2n2
  Replies (5) Good night (2412) Bad night (1060)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing

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  (216): Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing http://tfl.nu/jpc8
  Replies (4) Good night (2015) Bad night (970)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.

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  (859): That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka. http://tfl.nu/6iko
  Replies (1) Good night (1584) Bad night (596)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.

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  (651): Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor. http://tfl.nu/v2bs
  Replies (7) Good night (1724) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding

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  (540): He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding http://tfl.nu/2362
  Replies (7) Good night (688) Bad night (1181)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.

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  (727): Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what. http://tfl.nu/k4ko
  Replies (5) Good night (1864) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.

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  (937): I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies. http://tfl.nu/8j70
  Replies (2) Good night (435) Bad night (627)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu

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  (303): Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu http://tfl.nu/5y7f
  Replies (9) Good night (475) Bad night (721)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.

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  (407): I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober. http://tfl.nu/la4k
  Replies (5) Good night (892) Bad night (360)

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