First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize