why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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