We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
