I'm going to jail i love you
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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