Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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