I don't usually arrange sex via text message
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
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i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
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Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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