he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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