OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
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