Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games

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(417): View more from Missouri

When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.

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(708): View more from Illinois

as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(646): View more from New York

Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B

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(970): View more from Colorado

Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.

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(480): View more from Arizona

library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.

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(313): View more from Michigan

How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.

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(613): View more from Ontario

Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome

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