So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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