i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
