I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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