And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I think I have vodka in my lungs
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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