think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
