My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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