Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
