I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
