Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
